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I will start my diet on Monday.
Cheesecake
I still look 18.
Bubblegum
He is not gay.
Banana Cream
I am a goddess.
Grape
I can function without coffee.
Coffee
My butt is not big.
Butterscotch
I am not pregnant.
Cherry
Awesome WAHM Samples
I would never be on Jerry Springer!
Lime
I am nothing like my mother.
Pineapple
I don't have a drinking problem.
Rootbeer
This has no calories.
Watermelon
This is good for you.
Orange
My breath never stinks.
Peppermint
I never lie.
Cinnamon
He likes me for my personality.
Strawberry
I know who my baby's daddy is.
Lemon
My kids aren't ugly.
Candy Apple
My hair is naturally this color.
Hot Buttered Rum
Size dosn't matter
Fuzzy Naval
I have never been arrested.
Orange Pineapple
I'm just big boned.
Candy Corn
My stretch marks are sexy.
Chocolate Mist
My boobs are real.
Apple Butter
He loves me more than his wife.
Mai Tai
My house is always spotless.
Pink Lemonade
He's not taking me out to get in my pants.
Snickerdoodle
My mother in law loves me.
Hazelnut
I can keep a secret.
Lemonade
I'm a good driver.
Orange Cream
An apple a day keeps the doctor away.
Apple
I love all my kids the same.
Raspberry
He doesn't need Viagra.
Creme Brulee
My family gets along at the holidays.
Egg Nog
I never have that 'Not so fresh feeling'.
Pumpkin Pie
This won't make me fat.
Chocolate Hazelnut
All bathing suits look good on me.
Chocolate Mint
You have a great husband.
Cola
It isn't morning sickness.
Ginger
My feet are sexy.
Salt Water Taffy
My boyfriend's mullet is cool.
Lemon Lime
I don't need to wear a bra in public.
Tutti Fruity
My children are angels.
Banana Split
I can quit smoking anytime I want.
Wintergreen
Choose Your Denial
I look good in my sweats.
Pina Colada
This outfit makes me look skinny.
Cotton Candy
I don't need to shave my legs.
Peach
The scale must be broken!
Cinnabun
Damn it, woman! I wear the pants in this family!
Tropical Punch
It's not burnt, It's CAJUN!
Creme Soda
Seriously in Denial
Denials of the Month club
I drink red wine for my health.
Cherry Vanilla
I am going to get a big raise next month.
Juicy Pear
Power Pops - Diet Lollipops with Hoodia
Dye Free Candy
My online friends are my TRUE friends.
Coconut
Ketchup counts as a vegetable.
Blueberry
Try on some denial!
Sampler Packages
My credit score is 900.
Raspberry Lemonade
Peenie Pops
You are a star!
Multi-tasking really works!
Boysenberry
I never get hang overs.
Hazelnut Mocha
I would never hit on a married man.
Melon Margarita
I never gain weight during the holidays.
Sugar Cookie
I would never accidentally order LONG ISLAND ice tea.
Vanilla Cola
I would never lose the car keys.
Dr. Pepper
I would never put my date in a position to have to hold my hair while I puke.
Strawberry Daquiri
I am the most important person in the world!
Strawberry Banana
I am still a virgin.
Cherry Cheesecake
I would never seduce my best friend's drunk boyfriend after she passed out!
Cherry Cola
I would never leave my drunk friends at
the bar to party elsewhere and show up at
closing, telling them they just couldn't find me.
Lemon-Lime Soda
I would never flash my boobies... and allow photgraphs.
Amaretto Sour
Baghdad is beautiful in the summer.
Cherry Berry Blast
I am not addicted to the diaper hunt.
Sour Apple
My jokes are funny.
Licorice
I do not procrastinate.
Marshmallow
I would never let my kids watch t.v. all day because I am hung over.
Peppermint Mocha
I would never get a haircut after a night of boozin'.
Bahama Splash
I would never drop my drunk friends off at the wrong house.
Cherry Vanilla Cola
Pick a Stick!
Edible Cake Decorations
I AM NOT CRANKY!!!
Sour Grapes
I am not perpetually late.
Red Licorice
I never get PMS.
Raspberry Chocolate
You can not have too many shoes.
Mango Pineapple
I don't have a potty mouth.
Banana Berry Smoothie
We don't eat fast food for dinner every night.
Cherry Limeade